Smile :- A curve that can set a lot of things straight.
Rumor :- News that travels at the speed of sound.
Dictionary:- The only place where divorce comes before marriage.
College :- A place where some pursue learning and others learn pursuing.
Ecstasy :- A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before.
Office :- A place where you can relax after your strenuous homelife.
Yawn :- The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.
Etc. :- A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.
Committee :- Individuals who can do nothingÂ individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.
Classic :- A book which people praise, but do not read.
Marriage :- It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and woman gains her master's.
Worry :- Interest paid on trouble before it falls due.
Experience:- The name men give to their mistakes.
Tears :- The hydraulic force by which masculine power is defeated by feminine power.
Atom Bomb :- An invention to end all inventions.
Philosopher:-A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead.
Diplomat :- A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.
Optimist :- A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into a river.
Pessimist :- A person who says that O is the last letter in ZERO, instead of the first letter in word OPPORTUNITY.
Miser :- A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.
Father :- A banker provided by nature.
Criminal :- A guy no different from the rest...except that he got caught.
Boss :- Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.
Politician:- One who shakes your hand before elections and your confidence after.
Doctor :- A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills.
Software Engineer:- Who is paid for reading this mail.